The Legacy: Part 9

I mostly just thought this picture looked hot. Get that tongue in there!

Aedin and Aimes (these 'A' names are going to be the death of me) FINALLY got their chance to enjoy a round of leapfrog!

In the baby's room, no less. Good for them!

And speaking of babies, Matty is a very happy daddy once again.

Oh yes, he is simply THRILLED about the new baby penis in the family.

In fact, he SO thrilled about being a dad that he took a moment to recall how many times he has knocked his wife up now.

And it turns out that Aimes isn't really into kids.

 Matty: "So that was once in the hot tub...and in the elevator...and our wedding night...so three more times should be good, I think."

That kind of talk started to freak Aimes out a bit.

 I think this look says "keep that shit out of my uterus".

Aw, come on. You know you want a baby Aimes.

Oh yeah, totally looking forward to motherhood.

And while little Mathis was wriggling around on the floor, he grew up into a toddler!

With durp hair! Do-over!

MUCH better!

 He's so fucking cute. He better stay that way when he grows up.

 Look at this kid. I seriously hope he grows up to be a lady killer.

And then I realized the back of his shirt has a panda ass!

 That's fantastic.

Aedin was so energized after losing her virginity that she decided to tend her garden...

 ...in her lingerie.

Did I mention this girl's boobs yet? I'm going to mention them again just to make sure.

 BOOBS MOTHERFUCKER!

Instead of having a private at-home wedding, Aedin and Aimes decided to get married at the park where they met with a handful of guests.

Their old butler showed up. 

 I guess to a butler "formal attire" means dressing down?

And look at this asshole who finally cleared his schedule!

Matty didn't care though. He was too busy having a contest with Mathis to see who could fit their hand in their mouth.

Matty won. TRY HARDER NEXT TIME KID!

The ceremony got underway. OG Matty started up some serious waterworks.

Pretty much everyone was feeling the beauty of the moment. Even that random guy in the blue jacket who was just walking by.

But OG Matty was taking it ESPECIALLY hard.

 So I started to wonder if Matty was crying as hard as his OG self when I realized he was NOWHERE TO BE FOUND!

That's right! He glitched himself right back home to stare at a wall.

 You the man, Matty. You the man.

No one really noticed anyway.

 And Ashlyn even creeped at their wedding. Get a hobby! You know, something other than piano, bass, guitar, drums, sex?

 CONGRATS BITCHES!

Aimes' very first durp...

 Welcome to the family.

Aimes was SO excited about joining the Lo household that she pissed herself immediately after the ceremony.

Then had a massive panic attack about it.

Probably because the ex-butler was laughing at her.

The party started to clear out without me even realizing it. Before I knew it Ashlyn had run off to take a subway, and I found Aedin halfway home in her mom's Mustang.

And then THIS happened.

YES, that is Aimes walking away from the park stinking like piss and leaving Mathis with the ex-butler!

But I made her go back and get him. Ya know, since his BLOOD relatives couldn't be bothered to take him home with them!

Parenting? That's for losers who don't have books to read.

Meanwhile, OG Matty continued durping.

Ceremony's over, bro.

Everyone made it back home just fine, and Aimes' stench made an Egyptian paparazzi guy vomit on the sidewalk in front of the house.

 And Cori missed the whole thing because I was retarded and forgot that little kids have to be at school at noon on Fridays. Not like it matters though since Matty missed the whole thing too.